


Silence (2)

by thegreatficmaster



Series: Supernatural Collection [53]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, M/M, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-18
Updated: 2019-07-18
Packaged: 2020-07-07 19:33:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19856869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thegreatficmaster/pseuds/thegreatficmaster
Summary: Y/n and Dean deal with the new complication with Sam.





	Silence (2)

As the weeks passed, y/n and Dean noticed something strange about Sam.

He was colder. Less caring and much harsher than they both remembered. 

They understood that his time in hell might have messed him up. 

But that didn’t explain the complete shift in attitude and personality.

Dean attempted to fix his relationship with y/n. 

He knew he wasn’t the best boyfriend when Sammy was missing. 

But he hoped he could fix this. 

He started by talking to y/n again.

The first time this happened, y/n burst into tears and sobbed for almost ten minutes, not even remembering Dean’s voice. 

Dean immediately took y/n into his arms, crying himself at seeing the love of his life in tears.

Dean apologised, over and over, wanting y/n to know he regretted the state he put himself in. 

But y/n wasn’t just going to get over it.

He forgave Dean. 

He never held it against him in the first place.

But their relationship was something that was so damaged, y/n wasn’t sure there was any fixing it.

Y/n had begun doubting himself.

He didn’t believe Dean could love him. 

He felt as though he never had Dean’s love in the first place.

Dean wouldn’t give up though. 

Not when it was y/n.

He couldn’t give him up.

Dean needed y/n so much.

He always knew y/n was the one keeping him alive, keeping him somewhat sane during the past year.

Now that he had his brother back, he was going to make sure he got y/n back. 

That way, he had his family. 

That way, Dean could make y/n happy again.

“Hey, y/n. I was-um-I was thinking, maybe you wanna go get some dinner?” Dean asked, y/n not lifting his eyes from the book he was reading, sat at the motel table.

“Umm…su-sure. Can you get me a burger, please? A-and fries”, he replied quietly, not being able to speak to Dean much without feeling the need to cry.

Dean sighed quietly, just wishing they could go back to normal. 

But he caused this. 

So he was going to fix it.

“I meant dinner. You and me? Maybe we can go to a restaurant somewhere? I know a little place a few towns over. Maybe-maybe we could go on a date?” Dean asked hesitantly, shifting from foot to foot.

Y/n glanced at Dean, catching his eyes and quickly looking back down.

“Umm-I-I-I think I’d prefer to stay in. You should-you should go to the bar”, he said , knowing Dean would find someone there.

Maybe Dean would love that person truly. 

Dean deserved to be with someone he loved. 

Y/n wished it was him. 

But he knew it wasn’t. 

So he stepped aside, leaving Dean to get with whoever he wanted, even if it killed him inside.

“I don’t want to go to the bar. I want to go to dinner. With you. Like we used to. Remember?” Dean stated, getting slightly closer to the table, hoping y/n would remember the fun they had. 

Whether it was a posh restaurant, a diner, or a sandwich as they sat on the impala, they always had the best time. 

As long as they were together.

“Umm-sorry, Dean. But I have to do this. You-you go”, he insisted.

“We need to get this hunt done. So stop with your sappy shit and let’s go”, Sam growled, just walking into the motel room without even knocking.

The men scrunched their faces in confusion.

They understood that maybe he wasn’t going to be all there after being tortured in hell by the Devil. 

But, the way he was speaking and treating them, wasn’t right.

The hunt was awful.

Sam had totally ignored all warnings, storming right in.

The vampires immediately fought back, jumping on top of y/n, throwing Dean to the wall.

_“Sammy! Sammy, help!”_

_Y/n held the vampire off him, staring at the man._

_But Sam just turned away, slicing through the other vamps, leaving y/n to fend for himself._

_“Fuck off. Get away, you vile shit”, he gritted out, attempting to swing the machete, the vampire having too strong a grip on him._

_“Bye, Twi-freak”._

_Dean chopped the vamps head off, pushing the body away and helping y/n to his feet._

_“You ok, baby?”_

_Y/n winced at the pet name, nodding his head and turning to Sam._

_He’d already dealt with every single one of the vampires._

There was a huge argument over it once they got back to the motel.

“Well? What the fuck, Sam? You gonna explain why y/n almost died, cos you couldn’t be bothered to help him?”

“Me explain? It was his fault. He’s the one who’s too weak to look after himself. Don’t expect me to bail him out and save him each time!” the younger brother roared back.

Y/n lifted his head when he heard a loud smack, seeing Sam’s head whipping to the side, Dean’s fist coming down.

“What the fuck, Dean? Why did you do that?”

Dean didn’t reply to y/n, walking into the bathroom, deciding he needed a shower right now. 

Well, it was more that he didn’t want to be around his dick of a brother.

Sam stormed out of the motel, going off to who the hell knows where.

Y/n just sat on the bed as time passed by, waiting for Dean to come out so he could finally have a shower himself. 

He couldn’t help but remember when everything was normal.

Well-not normal-but at least before Sammy left to the cage.

When he and Dean would come back after a hunt and shower together, more often than not getting a whole lot dirtier before they cleaned themselves up.

He wished he could let Dean back in. 

He could see all the effort his once lover was putting into getting him back, making him know that he regretted all the silence.

But y/n just couldn’t risk it.

Not again.

The pain was unfathomable.

He wasn’t going to put himself through that same torture.

Dean came out of the shower, seeing y/n completely zoned out.

“Y/n? Baby, you ok?”

Y/n’s eyes shot to Dean, seeing the worry on his face.

“What? Yea. Yea, I’m fine”.

He rushed into the bathroom, the sight of Dean’s now muscular body making him salivate.

But he wasn’t allowed to think about that. 

He had to be strong.

So he pushed all thoughts of Dean out of his mind, instead thinking about how different Sam was.

“It’s his soul. It’s gone”.

“Wait. So you’re saying he doesn’t have a soul? That’s why he’s so-dickish?”

Cas nodded.

Dean had a hard time accepting how difficult it would be to get it back.

Y/n listened as the angel and the oldest Winchester discussed it, Sam getting up at some point, having untied the rope.

He sighed. 

This was all such a fucking mess.

They spent the next few weeks researching, trying to talk to demons, angels, anything that might help them.

Eventually, they got to Death, Dean making a deal with him in exchange for Sam’s soul back.

Of course, he failed.

As much as y/n admired and loved Dean, overcoming almost anything, he couldn’t compare to fucking Death.

But somehow, for some reason, Death gave Sam his soul back anyway.

Y/n was sat at Bobby’s desk, playing with the phone wires, wrapping them around his finger.

The older man came up, looking at the poor boy he thought of as a son.

“How ya doin’, y/n?”

Y/n just nodded his head, not looking up at the man, knowing the second he did, Bobby would read him like a book.

“Son, I don’t know everything that happened. You were the one with him. Not me. But he told me what he did. And-please-you gotta know, that boy loves you. So much. And he’s not the only one. So, ya know, just don’t shut us out, ya idjit”.

Y/n chuckled at the name.

It was always like a blessing, a passing of a test, when Bobby called someone an idjit. 

It meant he trusted you. 

It was his own way of telling someone they were special. 

They were important. 

They were loved.

“I’m goin’ out now. Pick up some supplies. I’ll be back soon. Ok?”

Y/n nodded, the older man giving him a rare hug, knowing y/n needed it desperately.

He walked out, y/n waiting for the sound of the car leaving, before he got up.

Sam had his soul back. 

That was why he stayed. 

To make sure Dean had everything he needed.

Y/n went up to the room Bobby let him sleep in, grabbing the bag he packed last night and making his way down the stairs.

He crept down to the basement, seeing Dean sat next to Sam in the panic room.

Y/n watched for a while, seeing the healing in Dean’s eyes, the renewed hope.

He knew Dean was going to be ok. 

He had his brother. 

He had the one person he needed back fully.

Y/n walked back up, picking up his bag, and looking around one last time.

He walked out, hotwiring a car and driving away, tears falling as he left his heart with the man who would always own it, but never wanted it. 

Not really.

Dean sat with Sam, watching as his brother slept.

He was actually going to be ok. 

Well, he hoped.

Then he heard a second car start. 

Dean was sure Bobby already left. But he simply brushed the thought away. 

Looking to the stairs, he thought about going up. 

Maybe talking to y/n.

Now that Sam was fixed, he could get back to repairing his relationship with y/n.

There was no way he was giving it up.

He’d thrown it all away for an entire year. 

But now, he was going to make it up to y/n.

He was going to get them back to how they were.

He wanted to see the smiles that would appear on y/n’s face when he looked at Dean. 

He wanted to hear his laugh. He missed it, not hearing it for a year.

He was going to get it all back.

Dean climbed up the basement stairs, entering the library.

“Y/n?”

He looked around, not seeing the man.

He was sure he’d be in here.

He searched around, going upstairs and slowly pushing the door of y/n’s bedroom open.

“Y/n? You in here?”

Dean poked his head in, the sight making his heart drop.

The room was empty. 

All of y/n’s clothes were gone. 

His bag wasn’t there.

He wasn’t there.

Dean ran down the stairs, running out of the house, hoping maybe he could catch up with the car that had left almost three minutes ago.

He ran down the road, not caring about his heavy breathing.

Not caring about the tears that were blurring his vision.

He couldn’t lose y/n.

He ran for almost 20 minutes, his legs eventually giving way as he collapsed on the side of the road.

For the first time, Dean tucked his legs into his chest, holding them together and completely letting it all out.

He cried for almost an hour, not caring about the few cars that were passing, or the rain that began pouring.

Bobby was the one who found him, his front door being left wide open.

He dragged a freezing cold, completely soaked Dean into the Chevelle and drove him back.

Dean lay on his bed, unable to do anything.

He had lost y/n. 

All because of what he did.

He hated himself.

He deserved every bad thing that happened to him.

He broke the one person he promised to love forever.

So he just lay there, alone and cold, knowing y/n was gone, the room filled with silence. 


End file.
